Yes I AM a professional procrastinator. Not something I'm proud of but I won't deny it either. If there was a competition out there to see who is the worst, I mean "best" procrastinator out there I'll probably stand a chance of winning it. That is if I get around to filling in the forms, getting my credentials checked out and actually remember to get to the venue on time. But I digress.
Thou shalt pay.
It's not easy to be a PP (professional procrastinator). It takes years of training to master the art form and it's not for everyone. One has to have a zen like capability to focus. Yes you heard me right, to focus on anything but the task at hand. It take a lot of will power as there will be those proactive people out there trying to preach to you the down fall out putting things to the last minute. RESIST or feign reform to get them out of your hair so that you can focus on what ever your need to not focus on the task.
Thou shalt think
A little creativity could go along way as well. How else are you going to fill in your self proclaimed free time? Interested in knitting? Soap-box racing? What exactly is a smorgasbord? Be careful though, you wouldn't want to end up doing something as it'll defeat the code of procrastination. Just filling your brain with as much of mindless information as humanely possible is the mission here, NOT actually doing something close your ears PRODUCTIVE.
Thou shalt accept.
The next thing you need is forgiveness and acceptance. Yes you know you probably shouldn't put off your assignment any longer but that is the way you are built. No point going through the torture of changing yourself, so mind as well just forgive yourself for any repercussions and accept the way you are and other fellow procrastinators.
Thou shalt upgrade.
There are many ways to procrastinate. The age-old way was to day dream. Yes, to nurture the long forgotten side of you the no one else knows. But thanks to technology we no longer have to go through that hassle. Redundant information is just a click of the remote/ touch screen/ keyboard/ keypad away. That is the KEY to modern day procrastination. The old telly, internet, games, blogs, tweets and things that was suppose to make life easier has BECOME our life. Who cares about company productivity, final year projects, reports and assignments when the grand finale of Beauty and the geek is on? Will Paris ditch her "simple life" and FINALLY find her one true BFF? These becomes a matter of life and death.
Thou shalt play nice.
Perhaps if the world was filled with more PPs then it would be a more peaceful place. War would not be waged as it would take too much time and work. Differences would be freely accepted as long as we have our free time. And think of all the knowledge we can accumulate?! We can be a society of thinkers instead of doers. A great civilisation of intellects to come up with even more ways to deplete pure minds in to mush. Therefore I urge all procrastinators to unite! someday~
Currently I'm undergoing an ongoing PPA (Professional Procrastinators Anonymous) It would seem that my acts of delaying has had great effects on my social, emotional, and most importantly financial conditions and that I can be far more successful and richer if I had focused on my life instead. So says my shrink and mother.